I have been with my husband Wayne for ten years now and for the past three years we’ve both worked from home. In that sense, lockdown hasn’t been that different for us.
I’m sure without our individual healing journeys the intensity of being together day-to-day would have been overwhelming. Of course, sometimes we need our own space, that’s normal. But we have always prioritised our individual growth, so we can thrive both in partnership and independently.
Being seen for who we are is fundamental for us both.
I grew up not being seen. In my family there was a huge amount of expectation to do and be what those around me wanted. When I didn’t live up to the roles I’d been prescribed, I was met with withdrawal, control and separation.
I complied because I was in a constant state of high anxiety, yet even as a child I could see that this behaviour was manipulative and unhealthy. It was narcissistic.
As empathetic and...